May 29th, 2007


(no subject)

Hair follicle drug testing--

I won't let you snip off any of my babies, jerk.

How should I go about this? Anyone have advice?

I was thinking maybe snip half of it near my scalp then tie on a fake dread in its place until the hair grows out and start winding the new hair back in.

Or just tell them I refuse and they can only pee pee test me?
in love

(no subject)

hey lovely cats! i dunno if anyone is interested, but i have a 115g/4oz jar of knotty boy dread wax (the lighter colour) that is about 2/3 full.

i got it a few years ago to do a friend's dreads, but i have not used it much. does anyone want it? i'll send it to you for the cost of shipping!

let me know or email me at gershling(at)hotmail(dot)com.

just thoughts.

[i'm under the impression this community welcomes dread-related ramblings and personal musings; if not, let me know and i'll remove this.]

i've had my dreads for nearly two years now. while they've frustrated and worried me from time to time, they've never been anything less than beautiful. they were my first form of body art/modification- i even remember the apprehension i originally had about getting them, because "this is something that will draw attention to me, whether i want it or not; this is something i won't be able to hide from people," as i said to a friend the night before. i'd never wanted anyone to pay more attention to me than absolute minimal necessity, being as i suffered from extremely low self-esteem and extremely high self-hatred-- byproducts of a longtime struggle with chemical depression. as a teenager, i always felt i was constantly being judged by my peers due to my weight and my looks. i rarely wore feminine clothes, prefering the baggy, unfitted hiding space of oversized t-shirts and jeans. my year in germany did little to bolster my confidence, between my hostile host family and less-than-accepting peers. i hadn't realized until recently that my general self-hate and negativity about my appearance were generated by the fact that i didn't think i was worth investing time in myself at any level- particularly how i looked. i always felt that time spent on myself was time wasted, because it was selfish to spend time on something so pointless.

needless to say, my desire for dreads won out over my self-hatred, something for which i am very grateful. though it was not an instant solution to [what had been] a lifelong problem, it was the first step. it was the first time i could commit to something intended solely for my own enjoyment and satisfaction, and the first time where what i wanted came before everyone else's wishes.

it has only been in the last six months when i have truly become comfortable with myself. my dreads have been there every day for me, demanding i spend time on myself, telling me i am worth the time and effort. these days, i buy myself nice clothes. i get dressed up and take myself out, even if it's just to get ice cream. hell, i'm not even afraid to eat ice cream in public anymore. i don't save make-up for special days, but i have no problem leaving the house without it. now, i can be told i am beautiful and instead of laughing or denying it, i can graciously say 'thank you'-- and mean it.

i know i haven't been here long at all, but i felt everyone here would receive these thoughts well. lately, my dreads have been on my mind a great deal more than usual. they want attention, and i am only too happy to grant them as much as i can manage. for those of you with deep emotional or personal attachment to your dreads, do you ever feel they center you? like they have a way of directing your focus? mine play a bigger and bigger role each day, it seems. they've become more of a part of me than i had ever anticipated, a surprise i'd never dreamed of. i hope you all have the same connections with your own babies. =)