Erik (cottonmouthdn) wrote in get_up_dread_up,

The Effects of the Grand Dread Experiment.

Hi folks.
Since I'm approaching 15 years of dreadlockedness, I thought I'd take a minute to pass along a few things that have happened with these ropes on my head during that time.

1. Obviously, I get lots of questions from non-dreaded people. You guys know the drill with this one. Be nice, answer the people in a pleasant way, no matter how obnoxious they can be. The creepiest ones come from certain types of women when I meet them for the very first time--"How do you have sex?" They're not even always drunk when they ask me this. I usually just say, "Really, really well. Just ask my girlfriend." They usually don't pursue this line of questioning much further. My girl would whup their asses.

2. I lost the ability to use regular-sized towels to dry my hair a while ago. I use beach towels now--those are the only kind that will wrap up all the dreads without any slipping out of the towel. And, yeah, they can be heavy as hell when they're wet. But it fully dries in a day or so, and it stops being really wet in a few hours. I wash it every week and a half.

3. Sleeping can be interesting. If I'm not careful to throw my hair over the top of the bed or to side, I can sleep on may hair and wake up "paralyzed" because I'm on top of it. Also, I've occasionally thrown my hair and hit my girlfriend in my sleep. She says the effect is like being hit with a scratchy whip or small rolls of carpet. Sorry, baby!

4. I have to be careful of rolling chairs--I've been known to roll over my hair or break it off near the ends. Ditto car doors. My dreads can get caught in seat cushions or door handles or trees or racks in the clothing store or whatever might be sticking out... and yeah, I have to pay attention to where it lands when I sit down to use the toilet. I have to be careful not to step on it when I crouch down to do something. I have to be careful not to put my foot up behind me when I lean against a wall, or else I am likely to put my foot right on my hair. I have to be careful not to dip my hair into people's food at restaurants or buffets. All of these things are incorporated into my regular life and are not a bother, really... I'm pretty used to all of them by now.

5. Forget hats other than tams and bandannas. In fact, I never go anywhere without a bandanna on anymore because my roots are ridiculously out of control and crazy fuzzy unless I do a lot of twisting, and to be honest, I just don't have the time or energy to do it that often with so many dreads, so it's bandannas or a tam for me most of the time.

6. I'm pretty sure I have the strongest neck muscles of anyone I know.

7. Forget cam-whoring your hair. Once it gets this long, you're gonna need someone else to take pics for you. My girl is nice enough to do that for me sometimes... because my stupid ego needs feeding, and you guys are really sweet whenever I post pics.

And, just so you just remember who I am...

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