Красное Динамо! (kikkomato) wrote in get_up_dread_up,
Красное Динамо!
kikkomato
get_up_dread_up

a year and some change

About 20 minutes ago I meandered into the bathroom under the ruse of "Oh, brb, potty time" with a pair of scissors. I was followed into the bathroom by my boyfriend who has since confiscated all scissors in the house, and we actually got into a physical wrestling match over a pair of them.

Well. Wtf am I supposed to do at this point? The past year has been intense with more pain then happiness, and I'm ready to shed some weight and start over. I've been flip flopping for the past month or so about ditching my locks but tonight I've made a solid decision, only to have my evil plans thwarted by my supposedly well meaning boyfriend. I am once again at a loss. So I pose a question for those who have cut off or combed out their locks after having them and nurturing them for a long time.. was it an easy decision? Do you have any regrets? Did you change your mind during the process, only to find that you can't really go back?

I wasn't ready, then I was, now I'm unsure again. It's hard to put into words exactly why I wear locks in my hair. It's hard to put into words how they've changed my thoughts and views of the world and my own personal ideas of beauty. It's hard to explain how much more calming and reassuring it is to fiddle with one of my dreads then it was to play with my brushable hair. I almost feel like I'll be giving up a huge part of myself if I cut them off, and in the same vein.. it's hair. I'll most certainly make a new set when my hair grows out. I don't know how I'll feel once/if I cut them off. I think that's what scares me. I'm sorry if this post is bizarre and rambling. I guess it's really up in the air whether or not my next one will be "goodbye for now, GUDU".

Till then, whatever it is.
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